More leaked correspondence: quickstepping Ramps considers his international future

Patrick Smith in today's Australian has unearthed (perhaps from the inner recesses of his mind) some correspondence about an England selection issue.

Extract

Hi Mum, it's Mark...just a little note to catch up.

Thought some recent headlines might have caught your eye. Those saying that I might be a chance for a recall. And even Mark Trescothick might get a job against Australia at The Oval. It is very flattering.

I spoke to Tresser about it yesterday. He isn't well. When he saw some of the cricket writers put his name up for a return, he fell apart again and God knows Mum he has had more breakdowns than your Morris 1100.

So it sort of got me to thinking Mum about playing in a Test match again. And I was wondering, if those awful tabloid people come around and ask you what you think of me getting back into Test cricket, could you do me a favour? Don't open the door. I won't be.

Mum, I know you thought I was the greatest cricketer since Dad but I wasn't really very good. Not in Test cricket. And I know you are very proud that I was able to reel off two centuries in 52 Tests but I did average only 27. I know you always say that it was still better than Steve Harmison but Steve wasn't a batsman and we are still not even sure he was a bowler....